Pope Linked to Infallibility Doping Scandal… is the Church Juiced?

Last week the Tour de France was the scene of one of the largest doping scandals in history; nine riders were barred under allegations of doping. On the heals of that scandal the world was shocked to find out today that Pope Benedict XVI has been indicted in a doping scandal stemming back hundreds of years. Critics have openly questioned Benedict’s long running infallible streak claiming that the 1 year and 2 month perfection streak is clear evidence that the Pope must be juiced. Now federal indictments have joined the critics in asking for some answers from the seemingly perfect Benedict. Donald Redding, a life long Papacy fan, had this to say: “Clearly the Pope is doping, his whole career he plays one way, and then BAM! He is perfect. It’s a classic Barry Bonds story. He’s a Juicer” The incident has cast into doubt the legitimacy of previous Popes who have similar infallibility streaks, and forced the Major League Papacy (MLP) to issue the following press release: Fans should brace for a far reaching investigation that may forever place an asterisk next to fan favorites like The Second Council of Lyons, The Council of Basel, Pope Leo II, and Easter.

Mugatu says that the Pope doesn’t need anymore attention, so he should lose the “funny hat”, and wear one of these: Ezekiel Hats


The Ezekiel Dakar Hat



The Ezekiel Dana Fedora Hat